Sunday, January 20, 2008

A Kindness Resolution

I haven't received any requests for over a month now, so I've participated in a few swaps instead. I also gave a spontaneous blessing package with a Transformation Doll to one of my fellow Board members because she just initiated a divorce. Amazingly, I only had one doll and it was purple. It turns out she has a very strong connection to purple. It trips me out how that happens, as if I made the doll for her intuitively before knowing it was hers.

I've also begun gestating a new creative project, which is demanding a lot of emotional energy and time for research. So I haven't been pursuing more exposure for The Conspiracy to generate requests (although I guess participating in the Every Day Kindness and Creativity campaigns may generate some participation). I'll gladly fill any requests that come in. But I'm trusting the flow of the Universe so that all of my actions remain authentic, instead of being driven by a sense of obligation. I don't want to get in over my head and lose my integrity (a kindness to myself and others!).

So I've decided to expand this blog a little into my personal life by connecting it with the Every Day Kindness project (I've added the blog roll to my sidebar), as well as sharing more of my own journey towards kindness. 2008 is my Year of Kindness.

A post from my other blog:

I just started reading Christine Kane's blog and love her advice to overthrow the whole resolution idea and instead choose a word to "be" for a year. Resolutions are all about doing, usually one specific thing, and we usually fail. Resolutions are not holistic. But choosing a word, or quality, to be for the year, to focus our conscious energy on, would be extremely difficult to fail at (we succeed even if we live it one moment) and could potentially have an effect on every aspect of our lives.

The serendipitous thing about this is that I started seeing my years as words two years ago when 2006 became the year of forgiveness. I was given the opportunity to forgive the all the biggest of of my old wounds. I was challenged to grow out of the survivor mentality, to see that I was more than what I had overcome, and I am no longer succeeding in-spite-of. I was challenged to forgive in the moment, continuing to serve others as my best self while they failed me and the community. I was inspired to forgive myself and learned how important self forgiveness is, especially as a mother.

2007 is the year of opening. I opened to my queer nature and returned home to the queer community. I opened to accepting the mantle of leadership...finally. I opened to new friendships. I opened to finding a diagnosis for my health issues after 10 years and understanding how much they have impacted my emotional life in that time. I opened myself to healing. I opened myself more to creative generosity. I opened myself to new forms of art making. I opened myself to the future, to the possible manifestations of my bliss, to the reality that I have choices and can pursue the life of my dreams (as opposed to feeling choiceless and tied down). Even this week, as 2007 ends, I opened to the idea of moving -- leaving this house I am so unhappy with (cheap landlords+old house=lots of problems) and moving away from feeling responsible for my ex. In 2007 I have released the boundaries and limitations I had artificially placed on myself and opened myself to the life of my dreams.

"Beginning today, treat everyone you meet, friend or foe, loved one or stranger, as if they were going to be dead at midnight (including yourself). Extend to each person, no matter how trivial the contact, all the care and kindness and understanding and love that you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again." -Og Mandino

2008 will be the year of kindness. I have been focused on creative generosity, which allows me to keep a distance from the lives I am touching. I make it about the art and the giving, not about how I relate to each individual. I feel the urge to grow by responding to life, myself and others with kindness. Kindness is active and requires interaction of some sort. Kindness can replace my anxious social thoughts and allow me to be fully present to others. Kindness can open me to more connection. Kindness can inspire me to love myself enough to pursue good health. Kindness can carry me through each interaction with my ex until the day we no longer live together. Kindness can give me the space to accept all of myself and all of everyone else. Kindness can make me a better leader.

"Everyone is living with a pain body." Eckhart Tolle

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle." Philo of Alexandria

I have been carrying these two quotes in the journal in my purse for a long time. But I have not been living them and I want to.

PS Part of my inspiration for choosing kindness in 2008 is my new blog friend, Kindness Girl.

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1 Comments:

Blogger Kara Chipoletti Jones of GriefAndCreativity dot com said...

Thank you for sharing so much with us about your process in these last few "word years" -- it's so helpful to me to see others doing such great works while being in process, too.

I've been trying to let go of the idea that I have to be perfect or that my life has to be one way or another *before* I can "be" or fully participate in making the world a better place. If that makes any sense?

Thanks, too, for including the link to Christine's blog! I've run across her a couple times and really resonate with all she writing!

Sending you a zillion trillion miracles for your year of kindness!
k-

5:11 PM  

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